What Do You Do For Fun?

It is a question I dreaded.  What do you do for fun?  Seems innocent enough, right?  Not for me. 

I didn't have a mild reaction to this question.  I became anxious and somewhat irritated, as I was asked this all the time while at business meetings, networking events, and other personal and professional occasions. 

The truth is, at one point in my life and career, I didn't do much, if anything, for fun.  Nothing.  I worked all the time.  I didn't understand why people were asking this question so consistently.  Are we in the 4th grade? I thought those days of exchanging what we did for fun and our favorite colors were over and it was time to adult.   I wondered if these people had tons of time to have hobbies and schedule fun activities, and when I realized they at least had some, I got annoyed with myself.  Why didn't I have any time for this? How are they fitting this in?  What was I doing wrong?

My response to the "what do you do for fun" question was usually something along the lines of "I work out" or I would just flat out say that I had little, if any, free time.  I fumbled with my answer, and it was not clear or engaging.  It was meant to politely answer the question and then move on to another topic. I was climbing the ladder and working towards my master's degree.  I was an aspiring leader.  I became a director and then a healthcare executive.  I had big responsibilities.  I was on call all the time. I was busy.  I could barely use my vacation time to the point where I had to beg human resources for an additional bank of PTO because I couldn't use up all that was in the first one, and I was eventually going to start to lose leave that I accrued. 

The workout piece was somewhat true.  I worked out, sometimes, when I didn't cancel my personal training sessions because of work or exhaustion.   That happened pretty often, as I mentioned in a recent blog - How I Made Exercise Non-Negotiable.  The gym was my only source of "fun", or something that I did outside of work, that I could reference.

After changing roles and moving to Virginia Beach, I decided to focus on fun and living a little more, which meant I had to try new things.  I live in an area full of options, and it was a matter of designing my life differently, prioritizing mental and physical wellness, and creating balance.  

If my memory serves me, my introduction to trying new things happened when my friend, Suzy, took me hiking, as in a real hike, not just a simple walking trail.  My first hikes were out west, and I was hooked.  The scenery, the challenge, and the overall experience drew me in immediately.  We have hiked in many locations across the country since then, and have lots of stories and good memories resulting from each. Now I'm a hiker.

I love hearing the sounds of nature and our hiking boots as they move across leaves, sticks, dirt, and rocks.  I enjoy the quiet and peace that is only found on the trails. There is a sense of accomplishment as loops are finished or the top of a difficult hike is reached. Hikes are a great way to spend time outside, get exercise, and spend time with a friend.  

Around the same time, my trainer, Palmer, got me running again after asking me to run a 5K with him.  I had been a casual runner at other points in my life but it never stuck.  This time was different.  Completing a 5K was an awesome confidence booster, and I wanted to continue training for more 5Ks and longer races.  I cover this in my blog I Still Have Running.  Now I'm a runner.

I started traveling more, for pleasure, and also got a dog.  All of this, plus more, added to my life and created that fun that was missing.  While I still enjoy hiking and running, I think its important to mix up routines, so kayaking and paddleboarding are activities I've added into my summer plans.  Since I live near water, why not? 

Now I have a long list of things I do for fun and can properly and confidently answer this question, although ironically, it doesn't come up as much!    I'm a hiker, runner, traveler, and dog lover.  Maybe by the end of summer, I can also call myself a paddle-boarder!

While I did change professional roles and locations, I still believe finding sources of fun and adventure is a matter of priority, organization, and intention regardless of professional position or geographic area. Having fun things to do outside of work and family obligations allows for an escape from stress and gives our minds a break or something new to focus on.  

Asking me what I do for fun wasn't unreasonable.  Colleagues and acquaintances were just trying to get to know me and learn about my interests.  It was a fair question but at the time, it hit a nerve and that was due to my own situation and neglect of my personal life.  

If you struggle with an answer to this question, go find your fun!  It is out there!